I tell stories about characters stripping off their clothes and engaging in acts that most people would prefer to keep behind closed doors. My characters hurt each other. They bite. They slap. They use painful implements to bring pain to one another. And they fuck.
Call it erotica. Call it literary porn. Call it smut. It’s what I write. But why?
Discovering BDSM in my own life was a revelation. I realized a new depth to relationships. The things that we kinksters do to one another require a great deal of trust. When you are naked on a cross and blindfolded, you had better trust the person who is about to play with you.
To find this trust, we have to communicate with one each other. We have to share our dark fantasies, our fears, our desires in a way that most couples never do. This communication in turn breeds an incredible intimacy and a degree of openness that I had never known before I stumbled into kink.
When I write, I find myself exploring my characters motivations, their emotions and what brings them to this particularly place in their lives. By laying them bare in an explicit scene, I am able to lay them
bare completely. They become their authentic selves – fleshed out in the flesh.
My own fascination with sex and with female power plays into this of course. The characters I choose occupy a space in which they explore the role of women and the interplay between those seeking to control and those wishing to yield it.
Some in the BDSM community argue that sex and kink are not the same thing. I have always failed at separating them. When I chain partners up and play with their bodies, the sensuality I feel matches that of having great sex. I am not going through the motions, simply spreading my legs and waiting for it to end. My mind, my heart and my body channel together in a headlong rush toward satisfying my sadistic appetite.
I feel their skin. I listen for the cries my hands evoke. I watch their bodies writhing in pleasure. And, I relish the absolute power that I have over them in those moments.
We may never fuck afterward, but we will embrace afterward, holding each other as we soak up the after glow of our scene. Our bodies awash in endorphins and adrenaline, sweetly touching as we cuddle. For a brief few minutes, we share this earth as one.
Knowing the depths of these feelings – the trust, the intimacy, the power of two souls entwined – how could I possibly write about anything else?
Sex and kink, for me, divine the ultimate moments in our lives. They bring out our wants and needs, our willingness to bend our own morality, and our emotions lay bare for all to see. A man in pursuit of a woman he desires or a woman seizing the reins in her life, these things expose so much about who we are as human animals.
And that is why I write erotica.